Redaction.
May 02, 2006, 06:57 pmWhen I was 15, my sister told me about this just-turned-ex-boyfriend that had said something either extremely stupid or thoughtless (or maybe he used a word improperly) and when my sister protested, he replied, “They're only words.”
I think she repeated this a few times, “There only words. They're only words?! He said this to me!”
I remember this very clearly and thought about being pedantic and how choosing your words carefully and taking time to really think through what you want to say is really important. I guess I am not the best at keeping that to heart.
Yesterday, I managed to be incredibly rude and insult people on multiple occasions: the first, when I hastily reacted to something that really upset me; the second, when I really miscommuncated something that I been thinking about and inadvertently hurt someone's feelings.
I'll be the first to admit that I have a real problem communicating with people. I have the tendancy to come off as rude or harsh (JB used to say that I would “verbally punch” servers at restaurants). I do really try to be polite and courteous, but when I feel disrespected or taken advantage of, I am apparently not above saying something hateful.
I'm really embarassed about all this and I'm already trying to work it all out. I feel fortunate that people have pointed out to me when I've been rude or hurt their feelings, and at least I'm able to be more aware of it.